When we are born, our mothers get the compliments and the flowers.
When we are married, our brides get the presents and the publicity.
When we die, our widows get the life insurance.
What do women want to be liberated from?
The average man’s life consists of :
Twenty years of having his mother ask him where he is going,
Forty years of having his wife ask the same question;
and at the end, the mourners wondering too.
A Man was walking down a street when he heard a voice from behind, “If you take one more step, a brick will fall down on your head and kill you.”
The man stopped and a big brick fell right in front of him. The man was astonished.
He went on, and after a while he was going to cross the road. Once again the voice shouted, “Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step a car will run over you, and you will die.” The man did as he was instructed, just as a car came careening around the corner, barely missing him.
The man asked. “Who are you?”
“I am your guardian angel,” the voice answered.
“Oh, yeah?” the man asked “And where the hell were you when I got married?”
Everyone in the wedding ceremony was watching the radiant bride as her father escorted her down the aisle to give away to the groom.
They reached the altar and the waiting groom; the bride kissed her father and placed some thing in his hand.
Everyone in the room was wondering what was given to the father by the bride.
The father could feel the suspense in the air and all eyes were on him to divulge the secret and say something.
So he announced “Ladies and Gentlemen today is the luckiest day of my life.”
Then he raised his hands with what his daughter gave him and continued, “My daughter finally, finally returned my credit card to me.”
The whole audience including priest started laughing…. …… but not the poor groom!
Angar Quotes and Proverb
Anger is nothing but an attachment for an object, when expressed towards an obstacle between ourselves and the object of our attachment.
~ Swami Chinmayananda
Anger is one word short of Danger.
Anger can be transformed into productive energy.
~ John F. Murray
Everyone has a dangerous animal inside… The who he keeps it in the cage is the real human.
Many people lose their tempers merely from seeing you keep yours.
~ Frank Vanderlip
If you can imagine it,
You can achieve it.
If you can dream it,
You can become it.
~ William Arthur Ward
If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow.
~ Chinese Proverb
How much more grievous are the consequences of anger than the causes of it.
~ Marcus Aurelius
Anger and jealousy can no more bear to lose sight of their objects than love.
~ George Eliot
The world needs anger. The world often continues to allow evil because it isn’t angry enough.
~ Bede Jarrett
He who angers you conquers you.
~ Elizabeth Kenny
Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned, nor hell a fury like a woman scorned.
~ William Congreve
One should not lose one’s temper unless one is certain of getting more and more angry to the end.
~ William Butler Yeats
The strong man is not the good wrestler; the strong man is only the one who controls himself when he is angry.
~ Muhammad (PBUH)
I have a right to my anger, and I don’t want anybody telling me I shouldn’t be, that it’s not nice to be, and that something’s wrong with me because I get angry.
~ Maxine Waters
Never get angry. Never make a threat. Reason with people.
~ Mario Puzo
Usually when people are sad, they don’t do anything. They just cry over their condition. But when they get angry, they bring about a change.
~ Malcolm X
Speak when you are angry–and you will make the best speech you’ll ever regret.
~ Laurence J. Peter
Holding on to anger, resentment and hurt only gives you tense muscles, a headache and a sore jaw from clenching your teeth. Forgiveness gives you back the laughter and the lightness in your life.
~ Joan Lunden
Never forget what a man says to you when he is angry.
~ Henry Ward Beecher
Anger is a signal, and one worth listening to.
~ Harriet Lerner
If you would cure anger, do not feed it. Say to yourself: ‘I used to be angry every day; then every other day; now only every third or fourth day.’ When you reach thirty days offer a sacrifice of thanksgiving to the gods.
If you do not wish to be prone to anger, do not feed the habit; give it nothing which may tend to its increase.
Anger as soon as fed is dead-
‘Tis starving makes it fat.
~ Emily Dickinson
Anger makes dull men witty, but it keeps them poor.
~ Elizabeth I
When anger rises, think of the consequences.
Anger makes you smaller, while forgiveness forces you to grow beyond what you were.
~ Cherie Carter-Scott
Eat a third and drink a third and leave the remaining third of your stomach empty. Then, when you get angry, there will be sufficient room for your rage.
~ Babylonian Talmud